Okay, today has been a strange one and not really in a good way. I just have felt this feeling of loneliness, even though I’ve been surrounded by people all day long. I just felt so alone, ugly and unloved. My friends thankfully reminded me I’m not. I was hoping not to be hormonal this month during my period, but obviously that ship has sailed. Oh well, lol.
I knew it had nothing at all to do with Putz and things with my H have been going really well. We have been talking more, spending more time together and yesterday he had me laughing so hard I almost fell off my chair at my desk.
Then my Dad called me and asked if I was starting to get melancholy because the anniversary of my Mom’s death is on Monday. And bam, I realized why I was feeling so alone. Thankfully, time has helped to dull the once sharp pains of loss and I am usually able to smile when I think of her and realize how lucky I truly was to be her daughter. We have always tried to celebrate her life but we do usually go to Mass together and then to brunch on February 15th. I see now that we do it to help ourselves and each other cope with the loss of such an important part of our family. I know my Mom is happily smiling down at us with love and joy in her heart. This song kind of says exactly how I feel sometimes.