Those Damn Triggers

Every day I get a little stronger, happier and less haunted by the triggers. I guess when you have loved someone for almost 2 years, it takes longer than a few weeks to grieve, heal and move on.

Every week P (my ex whatever) would bring me Starbucks and it became one of many countless things associated with him.

Today after almost 1 month no contact, I finally went to a Starbucks at lunchtime. Lunch is another huge trigger as we would speak almost every day at that time. I teared up a little in the car before finally summoning my strength and going inside.

I have realized that he chose to stay in an unhappy marriage. That has to do with his fear and anxiety, not because of me. At times, people need to fight for you. If they don’t, you just have to move on and realize what you gave them was more than they were willing to give you.

He is my past. My future has nothing to do with him or his dysfunctional way of life.