I Wish You Enough

I just read this and it’s so beautiful and really touched my heart. I had to share it.

From

http://lessonslearnedinlife.com/goodbye-i-wish-you-enough-2/

“I wish you enough”

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter’s departure had been announced. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said: “I wish you enough.”The daughter replied, “Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom.” They kissed and the daughter leftThe mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry.I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, “Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?” “Yes, I have,” I replied. “Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?””I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral,” she said.

When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, “I wish you enough.” May I ask what that means?”

She began to smile. “That’s a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.” She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.

“When we said ‘I wish you enough’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them”. Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,

“I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.”

She then began to cry and walked away.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person. An hour to appreciate them. A day to love them. And an entire life to forget them.

Written by Bob Perks

Goodbye my love

image

I loved you with all my heart & soul mistakenly believing you to be whole Devoted to me while I adored you
Our love grew strong, so special & new.

Days passed in glorious wonder
Like the spell of my angeleyes
you appeared to be under
U had never known love
until I showed you the way
Though I loved you so dearly,
In the end you could not stay.

Hearts bound together
through time and space.
But now that heart is broken
an empty chamber in its place.

I continued to grieve and mourn
what might have been.
Never realizing our fate was cast
at the moment of first sin.

Beneath a cold fresh bed of snow
A flower dies without
a chance to grow.
A baby gone before
it took its first breath.
Our once joyous dreams
died a sad lonely death.

A promise unfulfilled,
a love that will never be.
I still had hope one day you’d see
U were my everything.
No one will ever capture
your heart like me.

After 8 months, I really needed to say goodbye to P. While I did have a few poems published years ago, this is my first attempt in over 8 years. So please be gentle. Thanks Kc 🙂

While the poem may be sad, I can honestly say that I am not. I am happy and hopeful for the next chapter of my life, whatever that may be. I’m going where the love is!

Houston, We Have Contact.

Uggh!  Why did I pick up that stupid phone?  He had emailed, called my work, my home and my cell.  I was good and ignored, but he wouldn’t let it go until he spoke to me.  Told me he has been miserable and is getting separated.  He misses me and could we just meet for dinner?  I laughed and said NO WAY!  I said it twenty different ways over the next 2 days.  But we did talk and laughed for about an hour.  And that’s all it took for my addicted brain to get rehooked!!!

Then we spoke the next day and he told me he was really upset because his son who never cries, cried all night when he found out about the separation.  He is scared to hurt the kids and now she wants to try (I guess the last 7 months were just practice?) because it upset her too.

I understand that this is extremely difficult and whatever he decides he feels he’s doing something wrong.  If he stays, she will never be anything more than a really nice roommate.  She hasn’t shown him love and affection in 20 years, she won’t start now.  If he goes, he feels like he failed, broke up his family and hurt his kids for his own happiness.  It’s a no win situation.  And I want no part of it.

So the best thing I can do for myself and for him is to take myself out of the equation.  Time is what he needs and time is what he shall get.  I choose NOT to be in his life, now or in the future.  I’ve thought about this long and hard.  I needed to be really honest with myself.

I don’t want to be with him for a lot of reasons.  I don’t trust him anymore and I don’t think I would ever be willing to take the chance necessary to make a successful relationship.  How could I ever be happy with someone that continues to make such shitty choices?  Most importantly, I would always feel like second choice to a frigid narcissist and that just wouldn’t make me happy.  Life is way too short to put up with such bullshit lol.

It’s funny, all his health problems, anxiety disorder, quirky fussiness, etc. never diminished my love for him.  But the fact that he could hurt me so much and be okay with himself?  Like there’s something wrong with me for having been so shattered? That says a lot about a person. That kind of made me finally admit that he’s not the man I thought he was.  He should stay with so so and pretend he’s happy for the rest of his life.

My choice is my H, who has never ever made me feel like second choice and who has never left me, even when things were rough.

Goodbye P and good luck.  I don’t need to know how your story ends because I know it won’t be with me. For the first time in 7 months knowing that doesn’t hurt, it makes me happy.

I actually told him to go where the love is lol. For me that is a bright and happy future with my husband. I am finally at peace. He needs to find his own.

Painful to Say Goodbye

by Brigitte
It’s really painful to say goodbye to someone that you don’t want to let go of, but it’s even more painful to hold on to them if they never wanted to stay in the first place. If someone doesn’t show you the same love that you show them, and acts as if you are unimportant most of the time, this may be a big clue as to the fact that you don’t need them in your life either. The only people you truly need in your life are those who respect you and want you to be in theirs.

For me, this has been one of the lessons I have had the most trouble adhering to.  It’s so simple and true.  But yet, my heart just kept trying.  I’m a pretty intelligent person who has never taken crap from any guy.  So why did I try so hard to hold on to our relationship? He made me believe in him and us.  But it wasn’t reality. It was self-destructive to have any contact with him at all.  Why do I keep letting him back in my life and in my heart?  What was it about him that I responded so deeply to?  It scares me that I gave my heart and soul to someone who was so wonderful, who said he felt the same and then showed the opposite.

I honestly became addicted to him and his love, needing more and more to feel good.  

One of the hardest things for love addicts experiencing a break up is breaking their denial. Denial is the PRIMARY psychological symptom of addiction. Denial is one of the reasons that recovery from love addiction isn’t effective. You cannot overcome a problem unless you come to fully accept that it exists. Denial comes in the form of:

-Ignoring how unhealthy the relationship actually was

-Believing getting back the relationship will solve the problems.

-Convincing yourself, it will “be different” next time.

-Not accepting the relationship is over.

-Believing the avoidant partner can be someone different from he or she is.

-Holding on to the fantasy you created from the beginning of the relationship.

-False hope that you can fix things.
I have to accept my powerlessness over my love addiction and the chaos and unmanageability it has brought into my life.

I know P is not a bad man, he’s actually pretty sweet.  He’s just not good for me and that’s what matters.