I know I write a lot about my Mom but I hope I also share how wonderful my Dad is. He’s 6’4, a big but gentle man and has always been laid back and pretty hysterical. He likes to tell stories and jokes. One of the best gifts he gave me has been my ability to always find the humor in ANY situation. He’s very sweet, loving, kind and he has always been 100% supportive of those he loves.
He grew up in Brooklyn with his older brother and sister. His Dad, a longshoreman, was killed when he was 9 months old. Fortunately, his Mom was a smart and strong woman, ahead of her time. She died when he was 16.
People tell me he changed a lot when he met my Mom. He let down his walls and totally let her in to his heart. She had that ability to tear down walls because like me, she didn’t see them lol. But it took courage to risk losing someone he loved with all his heart. I’m glad he is a brave man.
He coached my softball team from when I was 5-10. Anyone will tell you coaching young girls is not an easy task lol. In the beginning he actually bribed us with bubble gum. He was always kind, patient and he made us all laugh.
He’s a big, tough guy from Brooklyn who I never saw cry til I was in my 30s (a story for another time). So when I got sick and we found out it was severe clinical depression, he was definitely not naturally equipped to know how to act or what to say. But he read what my Mom showed him and learned almost immediately how to help and support me. He also made me laugh when I no longer thought it possible 🙂
When my Mom was sick and we were taking care of her, it sometimes got very stressful and we would get angry. But we couldn’t tell her, so once in a while we’d get mad at each other for the stupidest things lol. Probably not the best way, but we always laughed and apologized soon after.
One time he said something that hurt me very much in my very sensitive state and I mumbled under my breath, “I wish it was you”. Now my Dad wears hearing aids, is almost completely deaf and he wasn’t wearing them. But he heard and I hung my head in shame. He put his finger under my chin and made me look at him. He said “So do I sweetheart, so do I. So don’t ever feel bad for feeling that way. She’s your Mom, your best friend and your soul. I will try to be your best friend too.”
We will always be very close and bonded by what we went through. Only the 2 of us were there when she passed. He adored and loved her for 42 years. He could’ve easily given up when she died. I know he wanted to. But he didn’t for my brothers and I. And for their grandkids who mean everything. It wasn’t easy and it took a few years, but he is happy and doing well.
He met a widow from down South and they spend half their time here and half there. She’s a great lady who never ever tries to be anything other than who she is. Just like my parents, she had a wonderful love with her husband and nothing can replace that. But life must go on. They have fun together and laugh a lot.
My Dad has taught me to be strong and resilient. He also taught me laughter is more powerful than any drug and joy is a recipe for happiness.
My H and I are taking them out to dinner soon and I will take the time to thank him for always being there and for helping to make me the good person I am.
Happy Father’s Day!!!!