Love is more black and white than we like to tell ourselves. Don’t allow anyone to keep you trapped in the “promise” of the gray area. The bottom line is: If they love you, TRULY love you, they’ll do whatever it takes to be with you. There won’t be excuses or doubts or fears or hesitation. Love is ACTION. Everything else is just words.
~Mandy Hale – The Single Woman
This is what I have to keep reminding myself. No, we cannot choose who we fall in love with. But we can choose to keep going back to those that break us down with empty words and unfulfilled promises OR we can love ourselves enough to realize we don’t need anyone to be happy. We think we cannot live without them, but we can. We just have to accept what we can’t change.
P keeps calling me, at home and at work and on my cell. I have blocked him as much as I can, but at work I just don’t answer private calls. He says he’s getting separated. I will believe that when I see it lol. But even so, it still has nothing to do with me.
As for me, I am going to continue to go where the love is.
The bottom line is: If they love you, TRULY love you, they’ll do whatever it takes to be with you.
Love the quote. But if he doesn’t do you let go? Even though I want to let go, like Jarrod C said, I keep finding myself thinking and wanting him to come back and give it a second shot at least one more time..would he ever realise..ahh, i’m still torn between wanting to let go and hoping to stay and wait! Hate myself for putting myself in this state, when I’ve always been the strong woman..
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes if they love you, they will. And you have to eventually let go or you’re breaking your own heart. Believe me, I’ve felt weak too. As you heal, you will feel stronger. Hugs xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
I read somewhere that women expect that if two people love each other they will be together but that men will always also look at how the relationship would affect the rest of their lives. I think this is true and even more true as we get older so I think there is room for some gray. However in your case there is no gray. P is married and is a cheater. You don’t want to be with a cheater.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is pretty much exactly my thinking and his! Very true. He hasn’t had sex with his frigid narcissist in 3 years lol. He stayed without sex n love for 15 years thinking she would change n things would get better. Yes he cheated but so did I mull.
LikeLike
Sounds like a marriage he has stayed in way too long. You cheated if you are also married. If not it is a lot more gray. So that I don’t sound too high and mighty I should disclose that I have dated married women since my divorce and this is even after having a marriage that ended when my ex wife had an affair. I justified it in a lot of ways. I even came up with marriage categories ranging from very married to only a little married. Bottom line was that I never felt comfortable. I don’t do things anymore that make me uncomfortable.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh he totally should’ve gotten out years ago. But they are both gorgeous n everyone thought they had a perfect marriage! She’s a narcissist and is a master at faking. He’s actually addicted to the narcissistic cycle of abuse. He’s getting help for him n his kids n I hope he breaks free. Just not for me.
Yes I did cheat after living in sexless marriage for 3 years n telling H I would. I’m glad you learned. So have I. Affairs never work!
LikeLike
Your strength is admirable. Hang in there.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m trying lol.
LikeLike
Men have a tendency to push away but then after a little while, try to pull people back in. I think it is because we tend to have to work through our thoughts to determine what our emotions are.
I wish you luck.
LikeLike
Thnx. Have a great day tomorrow!
LikeLike
We can choose who enters our lives. It’s their behaviour that determines how long they’re welcome for.
LikeLiked by 3 people
So true! Thnx xo
LikeLike
You are doing so well… keep going where the true love is and you won’t go wrong. x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank u Felicity. xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Resilient is what you are. Sometimes strong, sometimes weak, but fighting for yourself the whole time. Keep it up and it will help you be happy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank u! That means a lot. xo
LikeLike
You’re a strong woman! xoxo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Not feeling strong kc but thnx xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
What will you do if he is telling you the truth? I understand you love your husband and your family but what will you do. I admire you so much cause you can stick to your guns and one of the strongest to be able to let go of the man you love but just wondering? 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
It’s self-preservation lol. I don’t think I could survive it again. He tried very hard to save his family n that’s what he needed to do. But he was able to let me go for 7 months n while I have forgiven, I would be a fool to forget. Time will tell right?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Exactly Self-preservation, we all do it during these affairs but only time knows what destiny has for us.
LikeLiked by 1 person
U know how people say follow your heart? In this situation u really can’t. Love is shown by actions not just words. Affairs suck lol. I will never have another. One was plenty 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Exactly affairs do not have the same rules. I just wish that I didn’t follow my heart like I do with Alan however, I just have to hope that someone else can steal it as he has…
LikeLiked by 1 person
They can if u let them.
LikeLike
Looks like you are following your heart and your brain.
LikeLike
Trying 🙂
LikeLike
OK if he let you go for 7 months to focus on his family, he needs to give you that same space while you focus on yours….IMO. (I may be assuming too much that you backed off over that time?)
LikeLiked by 1 person
I backed off? U mean let him go? Yes after 2 months of talking everyday, we went NC for 4.
LikeLiked by 1 person
…so HE should give YOU the same respect….right? If he truly cares about YOU and not himself? 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, he will have to whether he wants to or not lol. And they just told their son who cried all night (he’s 17 n never cries). He’s not ready and I think he’s realizing that too. I need time.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Take care of YOU!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank u Katie! I will. H n I have a party later then we plan to have a romantic night at home lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love the quote by Mandy Hale. Can’t listen to the music, but I’m with you, friend. Going where the love is today, and everyday. Today,
That love love is with my girls 😊
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thanx! I’m glad. Music won’t play?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Not on my phone is doesn’t – I can try from my computer later 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ok will try to fix. Thnx Lily! Miss u xo
LikeLiked by 1 person